My birthday is on Saturday…

And of course, it has to be controlled….. I bought my own presents though. A new case for my iPhone and acrylic French tips.
Yup

My life is a fuckin wreck.

Shit. 

So I’m sitting here in Vancouver.

Just thinking. And crying a little. Just stupid thoughts and memories keep coming back. I hate this.
I hate that istill love him and miss him and I wasn’t even with him. He told me he loved me and now he hates me and I don’t even know why.even after all the shit I found out I’m still crying over him.

I fucking hate it.
I want it to stop.
No amount of anti depressants can make it stop or go away and I just want to erase him from my life completely. I wish I could have just not even accepted his friend request on myyearbook in 2011. I wish I never started talking to him after we split.

I wish I never listened to him when he said he loved me. I wish so many things and I can’t erase it and I can’t change it.

Fuck. I haven’t had my heart broken in almost 2 god damn years and I hate how it feels.

Fucking shit.